The Book That Changed My Mind

Mindset by Carol S. Dweck is about two of the core beliefs one can have and how they are fundamentally opposed to each other.

The first core belief or mindset is the Fixed Mindset. People with a Fixed Mindset think that talent or intelligence can’t be fundamentally changed. You have a certain amount of talent and intelligence and no amount of work can help you overcome these limits.

For example, you are either good at math or you are not. You either have a talent for golf or you don’t.

When people with a Fixed Mindset encounter a challenge and they don’t succeed pretty much immediately, they most likely think that they don’t have a talent for it. They have the mindset of “I’m not good enough… and trying won’t change that. Ergo I won’t try again!”

People with a Growth Mindset on the other hand think that one can change through work. They encounter a problem and if they don’t succeed at first they will try again and through repetition and trying different strategies will eventually improve.

They have the mindset of “I’m not good at it… yet!”

A person with a Growth Mindset will actually welcome any challenge. Because in their view, even if they fail. they will certainly learn something and thus can only profit from it. A mistake or failure isn’t something to be feared, but simply an opportunity to get smarter and better.

Where do these two mindsets come from?

When you are praised for your talent or your intelligence, especially at a young age, you will eventually start to believe it. You will start thinking: “I AM intelligent. I AM talented.”

This will eventually become part of your self-image. Now this isn’t a problem as long as things go smoothly, because every success will just be a confirmation of your core believe: “Again I am proven right in thinking that I AM intelligent and talented.”

The thing is: We don’t like to be proven wrong. We don’t like to appear stupid or untalented. Not at all. Here’s a quote from an article of “The Guardian”:

“One study showed that “social pain” activated the same circuits of the brain as physical pain. Consequently any attack on our self-image is interpreted by the brain as physical pain.” Source

So what happens if all of a sudden things don’t go your way as a Fixed Mindset person? When you have been praised all your life for your natural talent at painting but now you encounter a technique which you just can’t seem to get right? And you should have been able to get it right on the first try because after all: You are talented, right? Right?!

The Fixed Mindset person won’t try again and again until they eventually learn it. Their mindset simply won’t allow it: You either are talented or you are not. There is no middle ground that allows for exploring and making mistakes.

So as soon as the Fixed Mindset person encounters a problem they can’t easily solve they will feel untalented and dumb. Which they can’t be, because that is not their self-image. Anything that threatens that believe will be avoided at all cost because remember: Being wrong hurts. And so they give up.

That means new challenges, stretching abilities, failing, experimenting without certainty of success… For a person with a Fixed Mindset everything that is needed for effective learning will be seen as a threat to their self-image. They will eventually approach anything in life with the fear of “Will I look stupid? If yes, I better not try it.”

Now compare this to the Growth Mindset:

When you are praised not for your talent or your intelligence, but for the effort you are expending to learn something, you will eventually start to see yourself as someone who does just that: Apply him- or herself!

This will become part of your self-image which in turn allows you a lot of flexibility in how to handle a mistake.

A failure won’t make you think that you are not talented but rather that you only need to try again. To apply yourself more.

Now if you have Growth Mindset you won’t think twice about trying new things because you instead of thinking “Will I look stupid?”, you will approach a challenge thinking: “What can I learn?”

How can I change my mindset?

The first step in solving any problem is recognizing there is one. If you found yourself in the Fixed Mindset camp, just being aware of it and knowing that there is also the Growth Mindset can go along way in helping you change yourself. (In her book, Carol S. Dweck describes the two mindsets in a whole lot of different situations which could help further recognizing a fixed-mindsets in different parts of your life.)

If you are struggling to understand in which camp you fall, it is possible to have different mindsets in different areas. Carol S. Dweck writes:

“I might think that my artistic skills are fixed but that my intelligence can be developed. Or that my personality is fixed, but my creativity can be developed.” Mindset by Carol S. Dweck 2008 Ballantine Books Trade Paperback Edition, page 47

So if you are struggeling with a fixed-mindset, it might help to think about areas in your life where you do have a growth-mindset and try to transfer your methods to the new area. But please keep in mind: Change is hard and it won’t happen overnight. As Carol S. Dweck herself wrote:

“Even now, when something goes wrong or when something promising seems to be slipping away, I still have a feeling of powerlessness. Does that mean I haven’t changed? No, it means that change isn’t like surgery. Even when you change, the old beliefs aren’t just removed like a worn-out hip or knee and replaced with better ones. Instead, the new beliefs take their place alongside the old ones, and as they become stronger, they give you a different way to think, feel, act.” Mindset by Carol S. Dweck 2008 Ballantine Books Trade Paperback Edition, page 214

So give yourself time and be patient with yourself. As B.J. Fogg, PH.D will say in a later chapter: “You only change by feeling good.”

And by change I mean long lasting, sustainable change which comes from being comfortable with who you are and what you do. No diet will help you lose weight and keep the pounds away if you don’t like doing it. And the same applies to any kind of change be that in wanting to become a comedy writer or seeing yourself as a growth mindset person.

My own journey

Before I became a comedy writer I wasn’t funny. Or at least I think I wasn’t. Which is basically the same because as as Henry Ford once said:

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t - you’re right.”

And in comedy that is especially true. If you think you aren’t funny, the audience will believe you and act accordingly. And if you think you aren’t funny and you are trying to write comedy it won’t go well. Because in the beginning most of your writing will confirm that believe. And when I say most of your writing won’t be funny I would guess around 95 percent of everything you write. Which is normal. Professional comedians have a success rate of about 10 percent. Only 10 percent of everything they write ends up as an actual funny joke. Again: Which is also normal. If writing comedy were easy, everybody would do it. (But it is also a lot of fun, so don’t get discouraged just yet!)

Now if you are like me and the world hasn’t given you any early indication that you are funny (be it by the way of being funny around your friends or being the classclown or having a talent for imitating other people, etc.) and you are cursed with a fixed-mindset regarding to you ability to change your funniness… Well, go read this chapter again!

I believe that comedy writing or being funny can be learned. Simply because I did it. And I did it with a fixed-mindset. I went from: “I could never do this!” to “I know I can do this!” in the span of a mere ten years!

And I didn’t have the information you have right now in your hands. But if you think that 10 years is a long time, then let me say: Yes. Yes it is. But it was and continues to be a wonderful journey.

And think about it this way: If all goes well in ten years you will be ten years older. The only choice you can make right now is deciding if you are going to be ten years older but also funny.

SUMMARY TIME

Grab your pen! Get some paper and now: Summary. Five sentences! Go, go, go!

THE ONE THING

Write down THE ONE THING which was most useful to you from the chapter.
Now think about one way you can incorporate THE ONE THING in your comedy writing right now. WRITE! IT! DOWN!

EXERCISE TIME

Getting good at comedy writing takes a long time. So it isn’t the best way to start to learn a Growth Mindset. And because I don’t know where you have a Fixed Mindset, this exercise will only be suggestions of activities that you can do and get better at in a short amount of time. All to reinforce the idea that applying oneself to a task will ultimately make you better at that task.

Exercise One

You don’t like solving puzzles? Try doing a sudoku. After you hated every minute of failing at it, go watch a YouTube video on how to get better at sudokus. Now try again. It’s gotten easier, right?

Exercise Two

You know the long sharp chefs knife in your kitchen that you are afraid to touch but your parents gave you when you moved out? Yes, that knife. Watch a YouTube video on how to cut vegetables, but not yourself! Just knowing where to properly hold a chefs knife will absolutely change your cutting game.

Exercise Three

You hate math? Man, I’m with you a 112 percent. And that’s why I was in the bottom percentage of my maths class. But what was the last mathy thing you remember doing? Again, YouTube that thing! You understand it better now?

Perfect! You are doing great!

Exercise Four

Do you have balls? Three of them? Learn how to juggle! It’s easier than you think. You can go from not being able to juggle three balls to being able to juggle three balls in less than XX = Some people on the internet say half an hour, some say an hour and some say the devil is dead, the devil is dead, the devil is dead. Some say the devil is dead and buried in Killarney. amount of time.

Well, truth be told, everybody can juggle three balls. The difference is mostly a matter of how long.